Phooey, Where did the time go?

Its great to be back. I’m slowly finding my routine in life once again as the dust settles around me. Pity the haze is still getting in the way.

This whole month has been one huge event after another. Pretty happening, and ultimately disruptive. It started when my parents came back home from Shanghai. My father had previously gone for a medical checkup that showed that he would require stents to 2 blood vessels, and on this trip they did an angiogram to finalise his situation. To their astonishment, he had 1 totally clogged and another 85% clogged. They immediately tried stents on him but to no avail, as the fat had coagulated to an unimaginable density, and the stents had no chance getting through.

Eventually, he had to have bypass surgery, an extremely invasive procedure that had only 2% risk of death. He went through with it and came out tops, of course, and he’s now recovering at home. For me, that entire 2 week period was just endless trips to the hospital everyday, being there for my mother as much as I could, giving her support and comfort in these trying times.

It didn’t help that our dear gahment chose this period for me to serve my country again in the depressive camouflage greens. While it may be great to once again meet up with my platoon mates, it was a challenge every evening as I returned to the hospital to check on things. My petrol use this month should be through the roof, even with the fall in oil prices.

Anyway, I survived the ordeal, and my few discomforts must’ve been nothing compared to what my father is still going through. Having your ribcage sawn in 2 is no small matter, and have titanium chains or staples holding them back together can’t be fun either. Ouch indeed.

I quite enjoyed my 5 days in camp though. I tried out a new gun which was very accurate, and did some catching up with the guys. It helped take my mind off things. For awhile, I was stressed over providing for the family in any and all ways possible. Being in camp meant that I couldn’t do nuts and thus, was relieved of my responsibilities, albeit only temporary.

So with all these disruptions, the first 2 weeks of this month was gone, and the pitfalls of being self-employed is that you lose your income when you are away from the desk. As my self-imposed deadline approaches, I’m constantly pressuring myself to hit my targets. So it was with great dismay when I returned to my desk and tried to recover my usual patterns, only to find that I have analysis paralysis. I guess being too far off from my usual routines have made me think twice over before every action.

Finally got off my ass and did some trades. Once again, profits came and went. This is one tough game indeed. Professional help I need. Yes. More research, more skills to acquire.

Wish me luck.